Sunday, February 10, 2013

You can't always get what you want....



So here I am

happy to have the change in my world
but

it's almost worse than before when I was with M -- because I had gotten used to no D/s

and got some taste of it when I was out dating

it woke me up a bit.

then along comes Sir P

and he understands that I'm floundering and offers to assist me

and

it's not ideal

he doesn't live here
and lives much farther than M
so visits are impractical and not expected

who would come all this way to have 5 hours with their partner

unlikely

but we are growing more and more close

I want to share the ups and downs and the laughter of my days
I want to curl up with him at night

he's a smart
caring
loving Dom

who I won't be able to bullshit
as

he knows me very very well

he knows about the blog
I don't know how much of it he has read
and I've decided that it's immaterial

this is who I am
He'll like it or he won't
this is me

and he likes me
and I  like him

we're working through how things would work for us
and have decided
not to put too many boxes around it

will I want to have sex at some point with someone?
yes

and I'll talk to Sir P about it

will he want to have sex?  Of course -- he's a healthy man with needs - he should

but right now do we want what we have with each other?

yeah

we do

and while - it's not what either of us said we wanted
sometimes

......you get what you need.


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7 comments:

  1. AnonymousFebruary 10, 2013 at 10:40 AM

    Well. It will be interesting to see what happens. :-) Enjoy.

    ReplyDelete
  2. AnonymousFebruary 10, 2013 at 2:54 PM

    Sometimes ideal and what we need are not mutually exclusive.

    I was not looking for a Master, boyfriend, lover or future husband that lived 3000 miles away and would spend much of our first years in training or deployed.

    But it is what I got.

    And it DEFINITELY is what I need!

    ~faithful



    ReplyDelete
  3. dancingbarezFebruary 10, 2013 at 2:55 PM

    Sometimes we don't know what we want until we actually get it. Wishing you the best.

    ReplyDelete
  4. sinFebruary 10, 2013 at 3:14 PM

    long distance never seems like what we want - but it can work very well.

    -sin

    ReplyDelete
  5. nillaFebruary 10, 2013 at 10:03 PM

    Fuck. I had a whole lovely reply to you and fucking google ate it. pfffft.
    (yup, my fart noise)

    The upshot?

    You are a special, unique, lovely, keen-witted woman. I'm glad Sir P sees all of you for who you are...and accepts it as the whole of you. You are a delight. You make me laugh, and grin and think and often, cry.

    You are one of the most incredible women I know. (and yes, I know more than two. So pfffff (again) !)

    I'm glad Sir P is there for you, and you for Him.

    each day is precious...enjoy them for what they are...I know you will.

    Hugs,

    nilla

    ReplyDelete
  6. AnonymousFebruary 11, 2013 at 12:14 AM

    It works for you both now. Long distance isn't always ideal. It has some unique challenges, but it can work out very, very well. I am happy for both of you.

    ReplyDelete
  7. UnknownFebruary 11, 2013 at 5:07 AM

    I never intended on falling in love with someone who lived in Australia, when I lived in the US, but it happened... and in the end it worked out for us. If you are meant to be together, it will work out for you too. In the meantime, just enjoy getting to know each other. Asha is always telling me it's about the journey, not the destination.

    *hugs*

    Turiya

    ReplyDelete

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