Nesting (a vanilla post)

flying about
gathering twigs
and twine
and
bits of fluff

tucked in it's spot
tidy
clean
complete

ready
for spring

*********************
I am nesting

which is curious -- because I'm shit at all the house stuff
I still have a few boxes that need to be dealt with
from the move

and my desire to be done with them is intense

My father laughed at me
when I picked up a dresser
on the side of the road
and started to fix it

"you've gathered a twig for your nest!"

I'll be finishing up my refinishing projects too

My big visit with the case worker is Wednesday
so I'll be focused on that this week

and

there's no preparing for it
not really
it's just about me
and my life
what I want
what I think I can deal with

what I think is too much for me to deal with

and

um

it's really happening you guys!

it's really starting to work out
and
I am marveling at it

I am going to have everything I ever wanted

ME

get's to have what she wants

sigh

don't get me wrong

it's going to be very very hard

and

I'm going to be exhausted
and frustrated

and I'm sure that there will be many times when I think

THIS is what I wanted?
THIS is bullshit and NOT what I wanted at all

lol

which is what every parent thinks sometimes -- no?

so -- today
if you think of SFP at all

imagine me -- singing "Another Saturday Night" (Thanks to Aisha)

bobbing around her house

nesting
and
happy