Friday, March 8, 2013

Bad things

Things have been sort of rotten around here.

the girls and I sniping at each other
the honeymoon

clearly

over

it's been tense

and hard for us

I have not enjoyed them very much this week
and they

have not enjoyed me

the week at work was insane

I could never explain how insane it was

and I've had very little time
but a massive need

for Sir P

we are tired
and
we are either not ourselves
or worse

perhaps TOO MUCH ourselves around here

and things will get better

I know they will

but
it can be easy to loose sight of that

and

I really

really

just need a spanking right now


perhaps I'm instilling a bit of a magical property to the spanking

perhaps because I cannot have one right now
I've elevated it

it's my Deus Ex Machina

but right now I want one.

I feel a bit bad writing it
because Sir P will read it
and feel a bit bad he can't give it to me

but that's not why I'm writing it

I guess - -I'm writing it
because it's true

and the fact that I need one?

well

No one knows better than Sir P that I need one of those

it's not news to him either.

at

6 comments:

  1. sinMarch 9, 2013 at 5:36 AM

    So many things I could comment on here that I don't know where to start. I guess I'll say that I hope this weekend and next week are better for you and your little family.

    And about Sir P and the spanking and him reading this - I think you likely have imbued the spanking with some magical powers, we do that kind of thing sometimes. It's very wise of you to realize that.

    And sometimes it's so hard to write truths unselfconsciously. I think you are doing a great job of that.

    -sin

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  2. abbyMarch 9, 2013 at 7:08 AM

    I love your down to the basics honesty and how in touch with your feelings you are. I hope for a better week for all of week, the testing period was bound to happen.
    hugs abby

    ReplyDelete
  3. AnonymousMarch 9, 2013 at 11:27 AM

    I cant help you with the spanking (wish I could).But with the girls being uter twats it showes thay are feeling safe with you.Its seeing how far you can be pushed and still love them.Its hard times but worth it. Just remember to stay calm and you are the boss.You are not alone it happens to as all. Would love to give you more surport but living in germany it a bit far. All the best just keep smiling
    love Ashlyxx

    ReplyDelete
  4. AnonymousMarch 9, 2013 at 11:45 AM

    "it's not news to him either." made me laugh ruefully and go "Awww" at the same time.

    I agree with Ashlyxx, it's because you have done such a good job with the girls so far that they feel free to be so much themselves. Hang in there sweety, kids always get worse, testing you, right before they make another leap forward.

    ReplyDelete
  5. AnonymousMarch 10, 2013 at 5:59 AM

    Sending hugs... what you're doing is so hard. That doesn't make you a saint or anything, it's just an observation.

    i'm wishing you could have the spanking you need too...

    hugs,

    aisha

    ReplyDelete
  6. nillaMarch 10, 2013 at 1:08 PM

    nods head at spanking.

    I think they do have magical powers (then again I believe in such things... :) :P

    Here's this neat little visual I use when MY kids are driving me to the brink. Hope it brings a happy to you...it always, always helps me.

    Picture a room, one with a black wall.
    Why is it black?
    because it's completely covered with the loop side of industrial strength velcro. :)

    Imagine your angels donning vests with that soft loop side ...only on the back...

    And then when they REALLY piss/annoy/snark?

    Imagine sticking them on that wall, and blowing kisses as you oh-so-quietly- shut the door.

    Isn't that a happy place?

    *laughing*

    nilla

    ReplyDelete

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