Question from Lurker day

Lil wrote:

What do you feel are the most beneficial impacts D/s has on your life?

Gosh -- what an interesting question.  I haven't given this much thought.  And I'm not sure I can separate D/s in my life from learning more about my sexuality in general

For me -- there is the before-- when I was married

and the after -- when I wasn't married -- started dating -- and ended up in a kinky life.

In the before -- I was insecure.

I believed that no man would want me

ever again

To have the strength to divorce -- I had to decide that I was ok with being alone for the rest of my life

that being alone was better.

I had not had sex for 5 years

and was told that it was because I wasn't attractive anymore

never having had a strong sense of being attractive to begin with - it was easy to believe.

In the after -- I learned that men would find me attractive

that having sex

and wanting to have sex

was good

healthy

natural

Is that because I was in a D/s relationship?

or because I was in a healthy relationship with someone who wanted to lift me up rather than tear me down.

Could I have that without the kink

yes

of course I could

so  -- it doesn't really give me the answer to the question.

I'm not sure I have an answer for that at all -- other than

I get to feel really comfortable and in my own skin -- all the time

and that' a beautiful thing.