Meltdown

The baby is sick

not horribly sick
but running a bit of a fever
and snotty
and crying and crying and crying

We had KK's birthday party
and she got to revved up
and too sugared up

and when I came back from my parents with the baby it was clear that I can't do the next 24 hours like this

and I called and arranged respite

and KK and FL

just dug in

KK's tactic was to have a fall on the ground tantrum
and FL's was to simply state that she wasn't going

during this they both bargained by telling me they would be good and follow directions

ultimately

I can't make them do anything

I can't force them into the car
so

finally

I just gave in

because I only have to make it 5 more days

and told them to go to their rooms
and stay there.

tonight they are allowed out of their rooms to eat dinner

and then must return

tomorrow they are not allowed out of their rooms until their room is clean (I have pointed out the logic of cleaning their rooms tonight so they can just be off restriction tomorrow.

they have both agreed to this

and even after the baby goes to sleep

I need them to stay in their rooms

Everyone in this house is miserable.

They are being moved on Thursday after school.  I will pack them up on Thursday while they are in school and  drop off their stuff.

and then I will take them to therapy on Thursday - where they will be told of the change and will go home with their new foster mom.

If I ever thought I could do this
today would have cemented it.

I wish it could be some other way

but it cannot

so on a day when I threw KK a really nice party
everyone in this house is upside down
and miserable.